Posts
(Winners in Bold, Odds in Parentheses)
Sunday, October 12th, 2008
Chicago (-1.5) at Atlanta
Baltimore at Indianapolis (-7.0)
Detroit at Minnesota (-13.5)
Oakland at New Orleans (-8.5)
Cincinnati at NY Jets (-7.0)
Carolina at Tampa Bay (-3.0)
St. Louis at Washington (-14.0)
Miami (-3.0) at Houston
Jacksonville at Denver (-3.5)
Dallas (-6.5) at Arizona
Philadelphia (-5.5) at San Francisco
Green Bay at Seattle (-3.0)
New England at San Diego (-6.5)
Monday, October 13th, 2008
NY Giants (-6.5) at Cleveland
Week 5: 8-6
Season (No Week 1 Picks): 34-24
October 12, 2008
October 8, 2008
Life on the Wildside: Random Musings and the Best of Week 5 in the NFL
By: N-F-L Correspondent Chris Kubak
Hello once again to all you football freaks, gridiron gurus, and fantasy fanatics. Are we already to week 5 in the NFL Season? Time flies when you’re having fun, I guess. Anyway, for those of you who missed the action because you were too busy watching playoff baseball (I certainly can’t blame you as there were some great games on this weekend), here’s the best and most captivating in the week that was in the NFL.
Minnesota at New Orleans: Reggie Bush Run’s Amok x 2
I think that it’s fair to say that the Saints/Vikings game on Monday night was one of the more frustrating and groan-inducing games to take place last weekend. Despite all that, the game was peppered with an iota of heart-stopping moments that, for brief periods of time, took your breath away. It was like the college student trying to get through mid-term studying with energy drinks, alternating between big rushes of energy and debilitating crashes back to earth.
Most of all, this was the game where the world was reminded why Reggie Bush was once one of the most electric and highly regarded college football players in the country. He had the brilliant speed, the gridiron presence, vision and explosiveness that marks several names and careers in Canton.
They were finally on display in the Superdome on Monday night. For those of you who missed it, Bush returned two second half punts distances of 64 and 71 yards for TDs to get his team back in the game and give them the lead in the 4th quarter, a lead which they couldn’t hang on to. It wasn't just the fact that he returned them all the way that made them so spectacular. It was how he did it: cutting his way back across the field, finding holes that shouldn’t have been there, skirting the sideline, leaving everybody to eat his proverbial dust. Those two plays, along with his 269 all purpose yards made him the talk of water coolers around the nation. If only he could get himself established firmly in one role…
Minnesota at New Orleans: Take Evasive Action!
Who would’ve thought way back in the spring that Minnesota’s early season resurgence would be spearheaded in large part by Gus Frerotte? Not only that, but that Frerotte’s personal resurgence would make Bernard Berrian look like a new man? Then again, most people expected the Vikings to compete right from the get go and not stumble out of the gate at 1-3. So it’s been a season of odd and interesting occurrences under the lights at the Metrodome.
Anyway, its 3rd and 17 with 7:16 left in the game, Vikings down by seven. Gus Frerotte heaves one up for the endzone, getting hit just as the ball leaves his hand. Two guys are in hot pursuit: Berrian and 2nd year wideout Aundrae Allison, both converging on the exact same spot on the field. They damn near run into and kill each other in the process. Somehow, they don’t and instead, the ball ends up in Berrian’s hands for his first touchdown as a Viking. It’s a spectacular play to watch unfold in slow motion.
It reminds me of that famous play in baseball where Fred Lynn and Brian Downing of the California Angels are both in pursuit of a fly ball and both crash into the wall, missing each other by inches and damn near killing themselves. Yet Lynn ends up with the catch. In a lot of ways, the parallels are uncanny.
Atlanta at Green Bay: Donald Driver’s Hands
Things have gotten rocky in the friendly confines of Lambeau Field these past few weeks. The sheen is off the Aaron Rodgers era in Green Bay, although for this past week nobody could place the blame on him. On 3rd and 1 in the 2nd quarter, near midfield and his team down 10-0, Rodgers rears back and heaves one up for Donald Driver, into double coverage. I mean serious double coverage. Most of the time that would be considered an idiotic maneuver…but we are talking about Donald Driver. If the ball is anywhere in his vicinity, there’s a pretty good chance that he’ll be able to catch it…and he does. Touchdown, Green Bay.
Washington at Philadelphia: Incredibly Rare and Oddly Tantalizing
Why was I the only one of my inner group of football friends not surprised by the outcome of this game? Maybe its me but I just don’t trust the play calling of Andy Reid. It's 1st and 10 on the Philly 18 yard line, Redskins trailing by 5 early in the 2nd half. Redskins QB Jason Campbell gives the ball on the reverse to Antwaan Randle El, who runs it up towards the sideline before lobbing it to TE Chris Cooley for the TD.
Seriously? A reverse TD pass to a tight end? When was the last time that was done? Has that ever been done? That’s a fine piece of trickery right there. The more I see the Redskins play and develop, the more I really like the way Jim Zorn is running this team. Looks like the Skins found a good one when they chose him.
Chicago at Detroit: Marty Booker’s Reacharound
Detroit sucks, this much is painfully obvious, even to Tibetan monks who have never seen a football or seen the game played. Hell, my brother’s cats could probably tell you that the Lions suck. Give Chicago the credit that they’re due here; they did play a damn good ballgame.
Anyway, the highlight of this game came early in the 3rd quarter, with Da Bears up 17-naught on the Lions. Orton tosses one up for Marty Booker but there’s one problem: Booker has a man all over him. The personal bubble was more than just violated; Booker could probably tell the guy what he had for lunch that day. To make matters worse, the defender gives Booker a shove in what is clearly a blatant case of pass interference that even a deaf, dumb and blind man could’ve called. Here’s what makes it special: Booker, despite being shoved away from the ball, somehow manages to reach around the defender (Travis Fisher) and make a one handed catch, grabbing the ball at its very end. The slow motion video of it makes it look like he’s balancing the ball on his left hand as if he were a kicking tee as he went crashing to the ground. Now to hold onto that takes some serious athleticism. Speaking of which, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a side judge throw a penalty flag with such vigor before in my life.
Seattle at New York (Giants): Delivery to the Loading Dockery
This was a game and a day that the Seahawks would love to have back. They just look awful out there. Garbage, as The Commish would say. It was the kind of game every Giants fan longs for week in and week out. Not having Plaxico Burress on the field turned out to be the biggest non-issue of the week in the entire NFL (at least that’s what I think).
With all that offense on display, the real highlight in my opinion was Kevin Dockery’s interception in the 3rd quarter. After picking off the errant pass from a scrambling Matt Hasselbeck, Dockery makes his way up field just consistently making defenders look silly. He bounces off of one man, jumps over another, spins away from a third, bounces again off of a fourth before a tag team of two or three guys manage to drag him down. He didn’t score, but over the course of the 44 yards he covered, he showed some of the best open field running and tackle-avoiding that you’re bound to see all year.
Slippin’ on Nuts Award: Wrong Guy Dummy
This week our esteemed award goes to the Seattle Seahawks for their pathetic performance against Big Blue. Most specifically during Ahmad Bradshaw’s impressive run in the fourth quarter, which very nearly made the list above. During the course of that run if you watch the highlights, right when the clock hits 10:51 remaining in the 4th, SS Deon Grant misses in his attempt to tackle Bradshaw and instead tackles his own teammate! His teammate had a chance to get him before Grant took him down from behind. It was one of the most ridiculous things I’ve seen all season. LOL Seattle.
Other Notes and Ramblings:
- Is Antoine Winfield the best Defensive player in the NFL right now? Seriously, it seems like the man is coming up with one or two monstrous, game-changing plays every week now. It’s both awesome and fun to watch.
- KC and Herm Edwards gets shutout. Hell hath become fiery again.
- Detroit’s Kevin Smith needs to work on his touchdown celebrations, granted he doesn’t get many opportunities to practice. After scoring the Lions only TD on Sunday, he proceeds to spike the ball hard to the turf…and then trips over his own feet. You have much to learn, grasshopper.
- At one point during the Jags-Steelers game Mewelde Moore ran the ball and dragged two or three Jags along with him, before they were all jumped on and flattened by 6’7”, 310 lb DT Tony McDaniel. In my mind, the one thing I thought of after seeing that was the scene from the 1st season of Family Guy when Peter Griffin is at Cheesy Charlie’s and belly flops into the ball pit while shouting “Hong Kong Phooey!” Yeah, I’m messed up, I know.
- There was a David Carr sighting this weekend in the Meadowlands and he was not sacked. More on this story in coming weeks.
- I purchased a copy of Madden 09 finally for the Nintendo Wii. Just couldn’t find it for a while. In my first game (playing on the 2nd hardest setting), my NY Jets defeated the San Fran 49ers by a score of 97-13. Alex Smith was sacked 10 times and had 3 interceptions before leaving with a severe elbow contusion. In the 2nd game, the NY Giants defeated the Raiders 90-17, with Brandon Jacobs putting up a 17-251 and Eli Manning throwing for 568 yards. Ah video games…
Chris’ pick record for the week: 9-5
Season: 38-21
That’s all I got for now, see you all next week.
Hello once again to all you football freaks, gridiron gurus, and fantasy fanatics. Are we already to week 5 in the NFL Season? Time flies when you’re having fun, I guess. Anyway, for those of you who missed the action because you were too busy watching playoff baseball (I certainly can’t blame you as there were some great games on this weekend), here’s the best and most captivating in the week that was in the NFL.
Minnesota at New Orleans: Reggie Bush Run’s Amok x 2
I think that it’s fair to say that the Saints/Vikings game on Monday night was one of the more frustrating and groan-inducing games to take place last weekend. Despite all that, the game was peppered with an iota of heart-stopping moments that, for brief periods of time, took your breath away. It was like the college student trying to get through mid-term studying with energy drinks, alternating between big rushes of energy and debilitating crashes back to earth.
Most of all, this was the game where the world was reminded why Reggie Bush was once one of the most electric and highly regarded college football players in the country. He had the brilliant speed, the gridiron presence, vision and explosiveness that marks several names and careers in Canton.
They were finally on display in the Superdome on Monday night. For those of you who missed it, Bush returned two second half punts distances of 64 and 71 yards for TDs to get his team back in the game and give them the lead in the 4th quarter, a lead which they couldn’t hang on to. It wasn't just the fact that he returned them all the way that made them so spectacular. It was how he did it: cutting his way back across the field, finding holes that shouldn’t have been there, skirting the sideline, leaving everybody to eat his proverbial dust. Those two plays, along with his 269 all purpose yards made him the talk of water coolers around the nation. If only he could get himself established firmly in one role…
Minnesota at New Orleans: Take Evasive Action!
Who would’ve thought way back in the spring that Minnesota’s early season resurgence would be spearheaded in large part by Gus Frerotte? Not only that, but that Frerotte’s personal resurgence would make Bernard Berrian look like a new man? Then again, most people expected the Vikings to compete right from the get go and not stumble out of the gate at 1-3. So it’s been a season of odd and interesting occurrences under the lights at the Metrodome.
Anyway, its 3rd and 17 with 7:16 left in the game, Vikings down by seven. Gus Frerotte heaves one up for the endzone, getting hit just as the ball leaves his hand. Two guys are in hot pursuit: Berrian and 2nd year wideout Aundrae Allison, both converging on the exact same spot on the field. They damn near run into and kill each other in the process. Somehow, they don’t and instead, the ball ends up in Berrian’s hands for his first touchdown as a Viking. It’s a spectacular play to watch unfold in slow motion.
It reminds me of that famous play in baseball where Fred Lynn and Brian Downing of the California Angels are both in pursuit of a fly ball and both crash into the wall, missing each other by inches and damn near killing themselves. Yet Lynn ends up with the catch. In a lot of ways, the parallels are uncanny.
Atlanta at Green Bay: Donald Driver’s Hands
Things have gotten rocky in the friendly confines of Lambeau Field these past few weeks. The sheen is off the Aaron Rodgers era in Green Bay, although for this past week nobody could place the blame on him. On 3rd and 1 in the 2nd quarter, near midfield and his team down 10-0, Rodgers rears back and heaves one up for Donald Driver, into double coverage. I mean serious double coverage. Most of the time that would be considered an idiotic maneuver…but we are talking about Donald Driver. If the ball is anywhere in his vicinity, there’s a pretty good chance that he’ll be able to catch it…and he does. Touchdown, Green Bay.
Washington at Philadelphia: Incredibly Rare and Oddly Tantalizing
Why was I the only one of my inner group of football friends not surprised by the outcome of this game? Maybe its me but I just don’t trust the play calling of Andy Reid. It's 1st and 10 on the Philly 18 yard line, Redskins trailing by 5 early in the 2nd half. Redskins QB Jason Campbell gives the ball on the reverse to Antwaan Randle El, who runs it up towards the sideline before lobbing it to TE Chris Cooley for the TD.
Seriously? A reverse TD pass to a tight end? When was the last time that was done? Has that ever been done? That’s a fine piece of trickery right there. The more I see the Redskins play and develop, the more I really like the way Jim Zorn is running this team. Looks like the Skins found a good one when they chose him.
Chicago at Detroit: Marty Booker’s Reacharound
Detroit sucks, this much is painfully obvious, even to Tibetan monks who have never seen a football or seen the game played. Hell, my brother’s cats could probably tell you that the Lions suck. Give Chicago the credit that they’re due here; they did play a damn good ballgame.
Anyway, the highlight of this game came early in the 3rd quarter, with Da Bears up 17-naught on the Lions. Orton tosses one up for Marty Booker but there’s one problem: Booker has a man all over him. The personal bubble was more than just violated; Booker could probably tell the guy what he had for lunch that day. To make matters worse, the defender gives Booker a shove in what is clearly a blatant case of pass interference that even a deaf, dumb and blind man could’ve called. Here’s what makes it special: Booker, despite being shoved away from the ball, somehow manages to reach around the defender (Travis Fisher) and make a one handed catch, grabbing the ball at its very end. The slow motion video of it makes it look like he’s balancing the ball on his left hand as if he were a kicking tee as he went crashing to the ground. Now to hold onto that takes some serious athleticism. Speaking of which, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a side judge throw a penalty flag with such vigor before in my life.
Seattle at New York (Giants): Delivery to the Loading Dockery
This was a game and a day that the Seahawks would love to have back. They just look awful out there. Garbage, as The Commish would say. It was the kind of game every Giants fan longs for week in and week out. Not having Plaxico Burress on the field turned out to be the biggest non-issue of the week in the entire NFL (at least that’s what I think).
With all that offense on display, the real highlight in my opinion was Kevin Dockery’s interception in the 3rd quarter. After picking off the errant pass from a scrambling Matt Hasselbeck, Dockery makes his way up field just consistently making defenders look silly. He bounces off of one man, jumps over another, spins away from a third, bounces again off of a fourth before a tag team of two or three guys manage to drag him down. He didn’t score, but over the course of the 44 yards he covered, he showed some of the best open field running and tackle-avoiding that you’re bound to see all year.
Slippin’ on Nuts Award: Wrong Guy Dummy
This week our esteemed award goes to the Seattle Seahawks for their pathetic performance against Big Blue. Most specifically during Ahmad Bradshaw’s impressive run in the fourth quarter, which very nearly made the list above. During the course of that run if you watch the highlights, right when the clock hits 10:51 remaining in the 4th, SS Deon Grant misses in his attempt to tackle Bradshaw and instead tackles his own teammate! His teammate had a chance to get him before Grant took him down from behind. It was one of the most ridiculous things I’ve seen all season. LOL Seattle.
Other Notes and Ramblings:
- Is Antoine Winfield the best Defensive player in the NFL right now? Seriously, it seems like the man is coming up with one or two monstrous, game-changing plays every week now. It’s both awesome and fun to watch.
- KC and Herm Edwards gets shutout. Hell hath become fiery again.
- Detroit’s Kevin Smith needs to work on his touchdown celebrations, granted he doesn’t get many opportunities to practice. After scoring the Lions only TD on Sunday, he proceeds to spike the ball hard to the turf…and then trips over his own feet. You have much to learn, grasshopper.
- At one point during the Jags-Steelers game Mewelde Moore ran the ball and dragged two or three Jags along with him, before they were all jumped on and flattened by 6’7”, 310 lb DT Tony McDaniel. In my mind, the one thing I thought of after seeing that was the scene from the 1st season of Family Guy when Peter Griffin is at Cheesy Charlie’s and belly flops into the ball pit while shouting “Hong Kong Phooey!” Yeah, I’m messed up, I know.
- There was a David Carr sighting this weekend in the Meadowlands and he was not sacked. More on this story in coming weeks.
- I purchased a copy of Madden 09 finally for the Nintendo Wii. Just couldn’t find it for a while. In my first game (playing on the 2nd hardest setting), my NY Jets defeated the San Fran 49ers by a score of 97-13. Alex Smith was sacked 10 times and had 3 interceptions before leaving with a severe elbow contusion. In the 2nd game, the NY Giants defeated the Raiders 90-17, with Brandon Jacobs putting up a 17-251 and Eli Manning throwing for 568 yards. Ah video games…
Chris’ pick record for the week: 9-5
Season: 38-21
That’s all I got for now, see you all next week.
October 7, 2008
Luck O' The Limerick: Week 5
With N-F-L Correspondent Pat Lavery (and his Fantasy Power Rankings) on hiatus until the midseason mark, I have added a new wrinkle to the Luck O' The Limerick recaps to feed your statistical jones: Top Fantasy Performer, Game Overachiever and Game Underachiever.
As always, you get what you pay for:
Sunday, October 5th, 2008
Carolina 34, Kansas City 0
So much for turning the page
as the Chiefs were thrown from the stage
The Kats made it look easy,
left Herm Edwards queasy
and locked LJ back up in his cage.
Top Performer/Overachiever: DeAngelo Williams, 148 total yards, 3 TD's
Underachiever: Larry Johnson, 7 carries, 2 yards
Chicago 34, Detroit 7
While their coach should be reprimanded
The Lions should be disbanded
Orton sure was the deal
made Detroit's defense feel
like they had all just been backhanded.
Top Performer: Kyle Orton, 24-34, 334 yards, 2 TD's
Overachiever: Reshied Davis, 6 catches, 97 yards
Underachiever: Calvin Johnson, 2 catches, 16 yards
Atlanta 27, Green Bay 24
Jekyll and Hyde once again rears its head
as Atlanta left Green Bay in its tread
Rodgers kept it tight
In the end, lost the fight
As panic in Lambeau starts to spread.
Top Performer: Aaron Rodgers, 25-37, 313 yards, 3 TD's, 1 INT
Overachiever: Roddy White, 8 catches, 132 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Jerious Norwood, 4 carries, 12 yards
Miami 17, San Diego 10
Not sure if the Phins are for real
They certainly do have that feel
They dismantled the Bolts,
Played like the Colts,
And Brown showed he was the deal.
Top Performer: Ronnie Brown, 24 carries, 125 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Greg Camarillo, 6 catches, 68 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: LaDainian Tomlinson, 57 total yards
NY Giants 44, Seattle 6
I'm not sure who did The Hawks worst
Manning definitely started it first
Jacobs took over the reigns
Gave Seattle some pains
I could've sworn Holmgren's head almost burst
Top Performer: Brandon Jacobs, 15 carries, 136 yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Dominik Hixon, 4 catches, 102 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Matt Hasselbeck, 11-21, 105 yards, 1 INT
Washington 23, Philadelphia 17
The first half belonged to the Birds
DJ's touchdown was too pretty for words
The Skins started to click
Portis smacked Philly with his dick
And left them lying face deep in turds.
Top Performer: Clinton Portis, 29 carries, 145 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Chris Cooley, 8 catches, 109 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Donovan McNabb, 17-29, 196 yards
Tennessee 13, Baltimore 10
The Titans won again
in a game ranked one out of ten
Not much more left to say
No one cares anyway
I think it's time to move on then.
Top Performer/Overachiever: Bo Scaife, 7 catches, 72 yards
Underachiever: LenDale White, 3 carries, 4 yards
Indianapolis 31, Houston 27
What the hell was Rosenfels thinking
he surely must have been drinking
To jump in the air
like he just didn't care?
The Texans just keep on sinking.
Top Performer: Andre Johnson, 9 catches, 131 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Steve Slaton, 16 carries, 93 yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Anthony Gonzalez, 1 catch, 3 yards
Denver 16, Tampa Bay 13
Another craptastic ordeal
that lacked any passion or zeal
Sure the game ended close
Both teams were morose
And the game was as exciting as oatmeal.
Top Performer: Matt Prater, 3/3 FG, 10 total points
Overachiever: Brandon Stokley, 6 catches, 52 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Brandon Marshall, 3 catches, 25 yards
Arizona 41, Buffalo 17
So much for that unbeaten season
As Buffalo was disemboweled like they committed treason
While Edwards was knocked out cold,
Isn't Warner supposed to be old?
Guess Arizona's in first for a reason.
Top Performer: Kurt Warner, 33-42, 250 yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Tim Hightower, 7 carries, 32 yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Marshawn Lynch, 65 total yards
New England 30, San Francisco 21
JT O'Sully didn't know what to do
Too many turnovers ran San Fran through
Faulk found paydirt twice
Gostkowski drilled it through thrice
Welcome back, Randy Moss, we missed you
Top Performer: Stephen Gostkowski, 3/3 FG, 12 total points
Overachiever: Kevin Faulk, 61 total yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Laurence Maroney, 10 carries, 26 yards
Dallas 31, Cincinnati 22
The Cowgirls rebounded with a squeaker
against an opponent significantly weaker
Jones and Barber put on shows
and yes, Cincinnati still blows
Their season forecast just got a whole lot bleaker
Top Performer: Tony Romo, 14-23, 176 yards, 3 TD, 1 INT
Overachiever: Felix Jones, 9 carries, 96 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Chris Perry, 13 carries, 31 yards
Pittsburgh 26, Jacksonville 21
Big Ben's performance was out of sight
In this Heavyweight AFC fight
MJD and Freddy bailed,
The Jag's running game failed
which gave the Steelers the win Sunday Night
Top Performer: Ben Roethlisberger, 26-41, 309 yards, 3 TD, 1 INT
Overachiever: Mike Walker, 6 catches, 107 yards
Underachiever: Fred Taylor, 25 total yards
Monday, October 6th, 2008
Minnesota 30, New Orleans 27
Reggie Bush awed the New Orleans crowd
He bobbed, he weaved, he wouldn't be corraled
Old Man Gus stole his glory
A late kick ended this story
As the Saints were left hushed and wowed.
Top Performer: Reggie Bush, 269 all-purpose yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Bernard Berrian, 6 catches, 110 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Adrian Peterson, 41 total yards
As always, you get what you pay for:
Sunday, October 5th, 2008
Carolina 34, Kansas City 0
So much for turning the page
as the Chiefs were thrown from the stage
The Kats made it look easy,
left Herm Edwards queasy
and locked LJ back up in his cage.
Top Performer/Overachiever: DeAngelo Williams, 148 total yards, 3 TD's
Underachiever: Larry Johnson, 7 carries, 2 yards
Chicago 34, Detroit 7
While their coach should be reprimanded
The Lions should be disbanded
Orton sure was the deal
made Detroit's defense feel
like they had all just been backhanded.
Top Performer: Kyle Orton, 24-34, 334 yards, 2 TD's
Overachiever: Reshied Davis, 6 catches, 97 yards
Underachiever: Calvin Johnson, 2 catches, 16 yards
Atlanta 27, Green Bay 24
Jekyll and Hyde once again rears its head
as Atlanta left Green Bay in its tread
Rodgers kept it tight
In the end, lost the fight
As panic in Lambeau starts to spread.
Top Performer: Aaron Rodgers, 25-37, 313 yards, 3 TD's, 1 INT
Overachiever: Roddy White, 8 catches, 132 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Jerious Norwood, 4 carries, 12 yards
Miami 17, San Diego 10
Not sure if the Phins are for real
They certainly do have that feel
They dismantled the Bolts,
Played like the Colts,
And Brown showed he was the deal.
Top Performer: Ronnie Brown, 24 carries, 125 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Greg Camarillo, 6 catches, 68 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: LaDainian Tomlinson, 57 total yards
NY Giants 44, Seattle 6
I'm not sure who did The Hawks worst
Manning definitely started it first
Jacobs took over the reigns
Gave Seattle some pains
I could've sworn Holmgren's head almost burst
Top Performer: Brandon Jacobs, 15 carries, 136 yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Dominik Hixon, 4 catches, 102 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Matt Hasselbeck, 11-21, 105 yards, 1 INT
Washington 23, Philadelphia 17
The first half belonged to the Birds
DJ's touchdown was too pretty for words
The Skins started to click
Portis smacked Philly with his dick
And left them lying face deep in turds.
Top Performer: Clinton Portis, 29 carries, 145 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Chris Cooley, 8 catches, 109 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Donovan McNabb, 17-29, 196 yards
Tennessee 13, Baltimore 10
The Titans won again
in a game ranked one out of ten
Not much more left to say
No one cares anyway
I think it's time to move on then.
Top Performer/Overachiever: Bo Scaife, 7 catches, 72 yards
Underachiever: LenDale White, 3 carries, 4 yards
Indianapolis 31, Houston 27
What the hell was Rosenfels thinking
he surely must have been drinking
To jump in the air
like he just didn't care?
The Texans just keep on sinking.
Top Performer: Andre Johnson, 9 catches, 131 yards, 1 TD
Overachiever: Steve Slaton, 16 carries, 93 yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Anthony Gonzalez, 1 catch, 3 yards
Denver 16, Tampa Bay 13
Another craptastic ordeal
that lacked any passion or zeal
Sure the game ended close
Both teams were morose
And the game was as exciting as oatmeal.
Top Performer: Matt Prater, 3/3 FG, 10 total points
Overachiever: Brandon Stokley, 6 catches, 52 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Brandon Marshall, 3 catches, 25 yards
Arizona 41, Buffalo 17
So much for that unbeaten season
As Buffalo was disemboweled like they committed treason
While Edwards was knocked out cold,
Isn't Warner supposed to be old?
Guess Arizona's in first for a reason.
Top Performer: Kurt Warner, 33-42, 250 yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Tim Hightower, 7 carries, 32 yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Marshawn Lynch, 65 total yards
New England 30, San Francisco 21
JT O'Sully didn't know what to do
Too many turnovers ran San Fran through
Faulk found paydirt twice
Gostkowski drilled it through thrice
Welcome back, Randy Moss, we missed you
Top Performer: Stephen Gostkowski, 3/3 FG, 12 total points
Overachiever: Kevin Faulk, 61 total yards, 2 TD
Underachiever: Laurence Maroney, 10 carries, 26 yards
Dallas 31, Cincinnati 22
The Cowgirls rebounded with a squeaker
against an opponent significantly weaker
Jones and Barber put on shows
and yes, Cincinnati still blows
Their season forecast just got a whole lot bleaker
Top Performer: Tony Romo, 14-23, 176 yards, 3 TD, 1 INT
Overachiever: Felix Jones, 9 carries, 96 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Chris Perry, 13 carries, 31 yards
Pittsburgh 26, Jacksonville 21
Big Ben's performance was out of sight
In this Heavyweight AFC fight
MJD and Freddy bailed,
The Jag's running game failed
which gave the Steelers the win Sunday Night
Top Performer: Ben Roethlisberger, 26-41, 309 yards, 3 TD, 1 INT
Overachiever: Mike Walker, 6 catches, 107 yards
Underachiever: Fred Taylor, 25 total yards
Monday, October 6th, 2008
Minnesota 30, New Orleans 27
Reggie Bush awed the New Orleans crowd
He bobbed, he weaved, he wouldn't be corraled
Old Man Gus stole his glory
A late kick ended this story
As the Saints were left hushed and wowed.
Top Performer: Reggie Bush, 269 all-purpose yards, 2 TD
Overachiever: Bernard Berrian, 6 catches, 110 yards, 1 TD
Underachiever: Adrian Peterson, 41 total yards
October 5, 2008
Week 5 Picks
Due to a busy weekend of birthday celebrating, college football and a rough touch game this morning, this is just straight up picks for the games today. I'll try to get these out on Saturday in the future, with write-ups and players to watch.
Hopefully, it will be better than the 6-7 I showed last week.
(Starting this week, I'm going to give the Las Vegas point spreads, just for kicks. All games are picked straight up.)
Week 5 Picks (Winners in Bold, odds in parentheses)
Sunday, Oct. 5th
Kansas City at Carolina (-8.0)
Chicago (-3.5) at Detroit
Atlanta at Green Bay (-4.0)
San Diego (-7.0) at Miami
Seattle at NY Giants (-7.0)
Washington at Philadelphia (-5.0)
Tennessee (-2.5) at Baltimore
Indianapolis (-5.5) at Houston
Tampa Bay at Denver (-4.0)
Buffalo (-1.0) at Arizona
New England (-3.0) at San Francisco
Cincinnati at Dallas (-16.5)
Pittsburgh at Jacksonville (-4.0)
Monday, Oct. 6th
Minnesota at New Orleans (-4.0)
Week 3: 12-4
Week 4: 6-7
Season (No Week 1 Picks): 26-18
Hopefully, it will be better than the 6-7 I showed last week.
(Starting this week, I'm going to give the Las Vegas point spreads, just for kicks. All games are picked straight up.)
Week 5 Picks (Winners in Bold, odds in parentheses)
Sunday, Oct. 5th
Kansas City at Carolina (-8.0)
Chicago (-3.5) at Detroit
Atlanta at Green Bay (-4.0)
San Diego (-7.0) at Miami
Seattle at NY Giants (-7.0)
Washington at Philadelphia (-5.0)
Tennessee (-2.5) at Baltimore
Indianapolis (-5.5) at Houston
Tampa Bay at Denver (-4.0)
Buffalo (-1.0) at Arizona
New England (-3.0) at San Francisco
Cincinnati at Dallas (-16.5)
Pittsburgh at Jacksonville (-4.0)
Monday, Oct. 6th
Minnesota at New Orleans (-4.0)
Week 3: 12-4
Week 4: 6-7
Season (No Week 1 Picks): 26-18
October 1, 2008
Life on the Wildside: Random Musings and the Best of Week 4 in the NFL
By: N-F-L Correspondent Chris Kubak
You cheered! You cried! You quite possibly threw your television remote through your brand new $8,000 LCD TV when you realized that you were going to owe your bookie some hard earned cash when your predictions came up sour! Either way, it was an interesting and, in some regards, unpredictable week in the National Football League. So let’s get to it, shall we?
Ravens at Steelers: Flacco’s Runnin’ Again
You would think that after his first week rushing TD against the Bengals, Joe Flacco would be worn out and done for the year. I, for one, wasn’t expecting to be including Mr. Flacco in this column so soon already but here we are.
Let me set up the play for you: it’s 3rd and 11 with the Ravens on their 32 yard line. Flacco takes the snap, runs all the way down the near sideline, turns around, runs all the way back across the field before unleashing a wild fling, on the run, pinpointing the ball into the hands of WR Derrick Mason. What makes this play so compelling is the fact that Flacco is not known for his mobility or his ability to throw on the run, not in the least. Being able to do it on 3rd and long only helps to raise your stock as a young QB, even if your team loses.
Chargers at Raiders: Chambers the Juggler
Chris Chambers’ move from Miami to San Diego is turning into quite a revelation this season with Chambers filling the first receiver role admirably thus far.
With the Raiders up 12-0 early in the 2nd quarter, QB Phillip Rivers tosses one over the middle to Chambers on a slant route. The throw is just a little bit too far out in front of him and hits off his hands flying high into the air. In the process, it actually sails over a pair of Raiders’ defensive backs before ending up in the hands of Chambers. It makes for a heckuva play on the part of Chambers and a heckuva play to watch in slow motion.
Two things I noticed about this sequence of events:
1) If Chambers hadn’t tipped the pass as high as he did, it surely would have been batted away or even intercepted. Its height kept the play going.
2) It’s almost as if he passes the ball to himself, gaining extra yards that he wouldn’t have had if he’d just caught the thing in the first place.
Still, this wasn’t the story in this game. That honor belongs to the Chargers’ big comeback as they scored 25 points in the 4th quarter to win and ensure that Lane Kiffin got the boot.
Broncos at Chiefs: Reach for the Sky, Tony
The betting man in me picked the Broncos to win this game, as did most of the free world. Even if I’d seen the stat that Broncos coach Mike Shanahan held a 3-10 record against KC going into this game, I still would have picked the Broncos to run away with this one. This is why the betting man in me is still searching the gutters at Monmouth Park Raceway for discarded winning tickets.
It is 2nd and 6 with KC nursing a 3 point lead early in the 4th quarter. QB Damon Huard lobs one towards the corner of the end zone, intended for the Chiefs’ finest offensive player, TE Tony Gonzalez. He under throws him a little bit, forcing Gonzalez to have to turn around and reach behind him while leaping towards the corner. He did all of this in double coverage, no less. It’s hard enough to catch one while having to reach in any direction. This is why Tony Gonzalez is all but guaranteed a place in Canton when his playing days are over.
Interesting note on this place and the Chiefs: this score put them up by more than one TD for the first time since OCT 14th OF LAST YEAR! It’s been 11 and a half months since they held a lead greater than 7 points! That has to be some kind of NFL record, or at least close to it.
Browns at Bengals: Braylon Edwards' Immaculate Reception
In what was almost assuredly the toilet bowl game of the week, both of these teams needed a win to save their season. Of coursem only one of them got it. It’s a sad year for Ohio professional football, that much is certain (I feel for you Ohio, I really do).
Anyway, it’s early in the 4th quarter and the Browns are actually threatening to score. It has not been a good year for them, just as it has not been a good year at all for WR Braylon Edwards. Between his dropped passes and his overall lack of opportunities to put up decent numbers, fantasy owners worldwide have been tearing their hair out over his performances.
It’s just a quick little sprint and lob play. Edwards has a man on him the whole way. Luckily, QB Derek Anderson put the pass high enough and almost overthrows his man. Edwards’ only chance is to reach out with his right arm and make a one handed catch, which he does. He almost makes it look easy in the process. The Browns after this game still don’t look any good, but this could be the play that gets Braylon Edwards back on track.
For those of you who missed it, he followed up his spectacular catch with a wicked air guitar solo. Rock on! (Commish’s Note: Spoken like a true Air Guitar Champion)
Texans at Jaguars: First Time’s the Best
This actually turned out to be one of the better games this week, contrary to popular opinion going into game day. After all, the Jags have spent the year looking for consistency to help them get back in the race again, while the Texans were just looking for their first win after a bunch of sloppy performances. While only one of those two things happened, both teams looked a lot better than they have up to this point in the season.
Jack Del Rio must have spent a lot of time watching the tape from the Dolphins-Patriots game and figured his team could use some razzle-dazzle of its own. Halfway into the 1st quarter, with his team on the Houston 41 yard line, he lines up Plainfield, NJ’s own Montell Owens behind center to take a direct snap. Owens takes the snap and proceeds to weave his way through a hole in the right side that most guys couldn’t find if they tried. Somehow, he manages to carry it 41 yards for 6! The blocking he had could not be described as anything less than outstanding.
Here’s what made that play extra special: this is Owens 3rd year in the league, and yet it was his FIRST RUSHING OPPORTUNITY EVER! Other than a catch he had against the Colts the week before, Owens (who was undrafted) has played exclusively on special teams for the entirety of his NFL career! That’s what I call making the most of an opportunity.
Cardinals at Jets: Kris Jenkins Gon’ Run You Ova’
The Jets entered this season with two major objectives: improve the offensive line (especially the left side) and shore up the D-Line to help prevent the run. In order to solve the latter, their management signed Kris Jenkins away from the Panthers and inserted him in the line at nose tackle. When they say that he takes up a lot of space, they weren’t kidding.
Playing with a sore back against a team whom has proven this year to have an explosive offense, a lot of people were questioning just how effective Jenkins would be. With 5:12 left in the 1st quarter, the Cardinals were threatening to be the first on the scoreboard as Neil Rackers was lining up for a 37 yard attempt. Jenkins would have none of it. To say that he beat the long snapper would be an understatement: he flat out ran the guy over! Mowed him down, bulldozed him to the grass even. Then, he managed to block the kick, knocking the ball all the way back beyond midfield to set the offense up nicely.
There may have been a lot of scoring in this game, but it was guys like Jenkins who defined which team would come out on top in the long run.
Honorable Mentions:
Both come from the Titans-Vikings game and both feature wide receivers:
1) Justin McCareins leaping and reaching up high to snag a Kerry Collins pass. After years of dropping passes from Chad Pennington, he didn’t drop this one.
2) Bernard Berrian’s nice one handed catch before being run out of bounds short of a TD. Nice indeed, but was helped by a perfectly thrown pass from greybeard Gus Frerotte.
Slippin’ on Nuts Award: Everybody’s Falling Down at Heinz
This week’s award goes to both the Ravens and the Steelers for their multiple demonstrations of being unable to remain on their feet. However, the Ravens take majority billing on this, particularly for the follies of the secondary during Santonio Holmes TD reception.
Runner-up this week is Tampa Bay’s Ronde Barber getting juked off his feet badly by Packers WR Greg Jennings. Come on Ronde, you’ve been around long enough not to be fooled by that.
Other Notes and Ramblings:
-The look on Kurt Warner’s face every time he threw an interception or fumbled the ball was priceless. It was just this dropped-jaw stare of pure frustration and confusion.
-Is it semi-appropriate that in his final game as Raiders head coach, Lane Kiffin’s counterpart was none other than Norv Turner, who held Kiffin’s job from 2004-2005 before suffering a similar fate?
-A Herm Edwards team won a football game handedly. Hell hath frozen over.
-If Jason Campbell keeps playing as well as he has of late, he’ll finally convert me from a dissenter to a supporter. What can I say? I grew up a Mark Brunell fan. Stop laughing.
-LenDale White needs a new endzone dance. I’m getting tired of that same nonsense he does every single time. We get it LenDale, you can’t dance. Maybe Warren Sapp can show you a few moves in between dancing on primetime network television.
-Brian Griese 3-0? Now hell hath frozen over AND pigs are starting to fly.
That’s all I’ve got for this go around. See you all next week.
You cheered! You cried! You quite possibly threw your television remote through your brand new $8,000 LCD TV when you realized that you were going to owe your bookie some hard earned cash when your predictions came up sour! Either way, it was an interesting and, in some regards, unpredictable week in the National Football League. So let’s get to it, shall we?
Ravens at Steelers: Flacco’s Runnin’ Again
You would think that after his first week rushing TD against the Bengals, Joe Flacco would be worn out and done for the year. I, for one, wasn’t expecting to be including Mr. Flacco in this column so soon already but here we are.
Let me set up the play for you: it’s 3rd and 11 with the Ravens on their 32 yard line. Flacco takes the snap, runs all the way down the near sideline, turns around, runs all the way back across the field before unleashing a wild fling, on the run, pinpointing the ball into the hands of WR Derrick Mason. What makes this play so compelling is the fact that Flacco is not known for his mobility or his ability to throw on the run, not in the least. Being able to do it on 3rd and long only helps to raise your stock as a young QB, even if your team loses.
Chargers at Raiders: Chambers the Juggler
Chris Chambers’ move from Miami to San Diego is turning into quite a revelation this season with Chambers filling the first receiver role admirably thus far.
With the Raiders up 12-0 early in the 2nd quarter, QB Phillip Rivers tosses one over the middle to Chambers on a slant route. The throw is just a little bit too far out in front of him and hits off his hands flying high into the air. In the process, it actually sails over a pair of Raiders’ defensive backs before ending up in the hands of Chambers. It makes for a heckuva play on the part of Chambers and a heckuva play to watch in slow motion.
Two things I noticed about this sequence of events:
1) If Chambers hadn’t tipped the pass as high as he did, it surely would have been batted away or even intercepted. Its height kept the play going.
2) It’s almost as if he passes the ball to himself, gaining extra yards that he wouldn’t have had if he’d just caught the thing in the first place.
Still, this wasn’t the story in this game. That honor belongs to the Chargers’ big comeback as they scored 25 points in the 4th quarter to win and ensure that Lane Kiffin got the boot.
Broncos at Chiefs: Reach for the Sky, Tony
The betting man in me picked the Broncos to win this game, as did most of the free world. Even if I’d seen the stat that Broncos coach Mike Shanahan held a 3-10 record against KC going into this game, I still would have picked the Broncos to run away with this one. This is why the betting man in me is still searching the gutters at Monmouth Park Raceway for discarded winning tickets.
It is 2nd and 6 with KC nursing a 3 point lead early in the 4th quarter. QB Damon Huard lobs one towards the corner of the end zone, intended for the Chiefs’ finest offensive player, TE Tony Gonzalez. He under throws him a little bit, forcing Gonzalez to have to turn around and reach behind him while leaping towards the corner. He did all of this in double coverage, no less. It’s hard enough to catch one while having to reach in any direction. This is why Tony Gonzalez is all but guaranteed a place in Canton when his playing days are over.
Interesting note on this place and the Chiefs: this score put them up by more than one TD for the first time since OCT 14th OF LAST YEAR! It’s been 11 and a half months since they held a lead greater than 7 points! That has to be some kind of NFL record, or at least close to it.
Browns at Bengals: Braylon Edwards' Immaculate Reception
In what was almost assuredly the toilet bowl game of the week, both of these teams needed a win to save their season. Of coursem only one of them got it. It’s a sad year for Ohio professional football, that much is certain (I feel for you Ohio, I really do).
Anyway, it’s early in the 4th quarter and the Browns are actually threatening to score. It has not been a good year for them, just as it has not been a good year at all for WR Braylon Edwards. Between his dropped passes and his overall lack of opportunities to put up decent numbers, fantasy owners worldwide have been tearing their hair out over his performances.
It’s just a quick little sprint and lob play. Edwards has a man on him the whole way. Luckily, QB Derek Anderson put the pass high enough and almost overthrows his man. Edwards’ only chance is to reach out with his right arm and make a one handed catch, which he does. He almost makes it look easy in the process. The Browns after this game still don’t look any good, but this could be the play that gets Braylon Edwards back on track.
For those of you who missed it, he followed up his spectacular catch with a wicked air guitar solo. Rock on! (Commish’s Note: Spoken like a true Air Guitar Champion)
Texans at Jaguars: First Time’s the Best
This actually turned out to be one of the better games this week, contrary to popular opinion going into game day. After all, the Jags have spent the year looking for consistency to help them get back in the race again, while the Texans were just looking for their first win after a bunch of sloppy performances. While only one of those two things happened, both teams looked a lot better than they have up to this point in the season.
Jack Del Rio must have spent a lot of time watching the tape from the Dolphins-Patriots game and figured his team could use some razzle-dazzle of its own. Halfway into the 1st quarter, with his team on the Houston 41 yard line, he lines up Plainfield, NJ’s own Montell Owens behind center to take a direct snap. Owens takes the snap and proceeds to weave his way through a hole in the right side that most guys couldn’t find if they tried. Somehow, he manages to carry it 41 yards for 6! The blocking he had could not be described as anything less than outstanding.
Here’s what made that play extra special: this is Owens 3rd year in the league, and yet it was his FIRST RUSHING OPPORTUNITY EVER! Other than a catch he had against the Colts the week before, Owens (who was undrafted) has played exclusively on special teams for the entirety of his NFL career! That’s what I call making the most of an opportunity.
Cardinals at Jets: Kris Jenkins Gon’ Run You Ova’
The Jets entered this season with two major objectives: improve the offensive line (especially the left side) and shore up the D-Line to help prevent the run. In order to solve the latter, their management signed Kris Jenkins away from the Panthers and inserted him in the line at nose tackle. When they say that he takes up a lot of space, they weren’t kidding.
Playing with a sore back against a team whom has proven this year to have an explosive offense, a lot of people were questioning just how effective Jenkins would be. With 5:12 left in the 1st quarter, the Cardinals were threatening to be the first on the scoreboard as Neil Rackers was lining up for a 37 yard attempt. Jenkins would have none of it. To say that he beat the long snapper would be an understatement: he flat out ran the guy over! Mowed him down, bulldozed him to the grass even. Then, he managed to block the kick, knocking the ball all the way back beyond midfield to set the offense up nicely.
There may have been a lot of scoring in this game, but it was guys like Jenkins who defined which team would come out on top in the long run.
Honorable Mentions:
Both come from the Titans-Vikings game and both feature wide receivers:
1) Justin McCareins leaping and reaching up high to snag a Kerry Collins pass. After years of dropping passes from Chad Pennington, he didn’t drop this one.
2) Bernard Berrian’s nice one handed catch before being run out of bounds short of a TD. Nice indeed, but was helped by a perfectly thrown pass from greybeard Gus Frerotte.
Slippin’ on Nuts Award: Everybody’s Falling Down at Heinz
This week’s award goes to both the Ravens and the Steelers for their multiple demonstrations of being unable to remain on their feet. However, the Ravens take majority billing on this, particularly for the follies of the secondary during Santonio Holmes TD reception.
Runner-up this week is Tampa Bay’s Ronde Barber getting juked off his feet badly by Packers WR Greg Jennings. Come on Ronde, you’ve been around long enough not to be fooled by that.
Other Notes and Ramblings:
-The look on Kurt Warner’s face every time he threw an interception or fumbled the ball was priceless. It was just this dropped-jaw stare of pure frustration and confusion.
-Is it semi-appropriate that in his final game as Raiders head coach, Lane Kiffin’s counterpart was none other than Norv Turner, who held Kiffin’s job from 2004-2005 before suffering a similar fate?
-A Herm Edwards team won a football game handedly. Hell hath frozen over.
-If Jason Campbell keeps playing as well as he has of late, he’ll finally convert me from a dissenter to a supporter. What can I say? I grew up a Mark Brunell fan. Stop laughing.
-LenDale White needs a new endzone dance. I’m getting tired of that same nonsense he does every single time. We get it LenDale, you can’t dance. Maybe Warren Sapp can show you a few moves in between dancing on primetime network television.
-Brian Griese 3-0? Now hell hath frozen over AND pigs are starting to fly.
That’s all I’ve got for this go around. See you all next week.
Luck o' the Limerick: Week 4 Recaps
After a one week hiatus, "Luck o' the Limerick" is back in full throttle!
This is just a working title until I (or someone much smarter) comes up with a better one.
As always, you get what you pay for:
Sunday, September 28th, 2008
Cleveland 20, Cincinnati 12
The Battle for Ohio was an ugly one
Lacked excitement, intrigue or any semblance of fun
The Browns got their first win
Did the poor Bengals in
and Cincinnati continues their losing run
Tennessee 30, Minnesota 17
The Titans stay unbeaten for another day
As they defeated the Vikes the Tennessee way
AP was brought back to earth
The Titan's D proved their worth
with their tenacious, inspired play.
Kansas City 33, Denver 19
The Chiefs pulled the biggest upset this week
as Denver's defense continues to leak
LJ rumbled all day long
and while Cutler looked strong
KC sent Denver down Shit's creek
New Orleans 31, San Fran 17
Not much to say from this New Orleans win
Brees, Moore and Meachem did the 49ers in
Deuce made his intentions quite clear
kicking San Fran in the rear
while doing it all with a grin.
NY Jets 56, Arizona 35
Touchdowns galore from this offensive show
Favre to Coles was on point from the very first 'go'
Warner threw a quarter mile
though it wasn't in style
As seven turnovers disrupted their flow
Tampa Bay 30, Green Bay 21
Another big win for the Creamsicle Bunch
They bullied the Packers while stealing their lunch
Rodgers left the game early
The Packers faithful turned surly
As Matt Flynn's offense severely lacked punch
Carolina 24, Atlanta 9
Smith came back with a vengence this game
Delhomme to Muhammad set Atlanta aflame
Turner was stagnant on the ground
and Matt Ryan found
that college and the pros aren't the same
Jacksonville 30, Houston 27
A game winning field goal keeps the Texans losing
Scobee and Garrard keep Jacksonville cruising
Slaton impressed me once more
Walter found ways to score
In the end, the Texans couldn't handle the bruising.
San Diego 28, Oakland 18
The Oakland Circus found another way to crumble
Kiffin's head went rolling, Davis continued to grumble
Tomlinson torched the Raiders bad
making Davis quite mad
Leaving Lane the loser of their rumble
Buffalo 31, St. Louis 14
The Rams' young campaign is already in retreat
While Buffalo became the new word on the street
Jackson found ways to run
but Green couldn't get it done
and Linehan was sent packing after another defeat
Washington 26, Dallas 24
The game of the week went the way of the Skins
and rebounded from a Week 1 loss with three straight wins
TO couldn't hold back any more
and the world is in store
for more tantrums and bitter chagrins.
Chicago 24, Philadelphia 20
Chicago was renamed Upset City
An epic performance that was solid and gritty
with star back Westbrook out
The Eagles were left in doubt
and that display at the goal line was shitty.
Monday, September 29th, 2008
Pittsburgh 23, Baltimore 20
Pittsburgh squeaked out a close one late Monday Night
Flacco and Baltimore's O looked ready to take flight
With the North up for grabs
and the Ravens throwing jabs
a Reed uppercut ended the fight
This is just a working title until I (or someone much smarter) comes up with a better one.
As always, you get what you pay for:
Sunday, September 28th, 2008
Cleveland 20, Cincinnati 12
The Battle for Ohio was an ugly one
Lacked excitement, intrigue or any semblance of fun
The Browns got their first win
Did the poor Bengals in
and Cincinnati continues their losing run
Tennessee 30, Minnesota 17
The Titans stay unbeaten for another day
As they defeated the Vikes the Tennessee way
AP was brought back to earth
The Titan's D proved their worth
with their tenacious, inspired play.
Kansas City 33, Denver 19
The Chiefs pulled the biggest upset this week
as Denver's defense continues to leak
LJ rumbled all day long
and while Cutler looked strong
KC sent Denver down Shit's creek
New Orleans 31, San Fran 17
Not much to say from this New Orleans win
Brees, Moore and Meachem did the 49ers in
Deuce made his intentions quite clear
kicking San Fran in the rear
while doing it all with a grin.
NY Jets 56, Arizona 35
Touchdowns galore from this offensive show
Favre to Coles was on point from the very first 'go'
Warner threw a quarter mile
though it wasn't in style
As seven turnovers disrupted their flow
Tampa Bay 30, Green Bay 21
Another big win for the Creamsicle Bunch
They bullied the Packers while stealing their lunch
Rodgers left the game early
The Packers faithful turned surly
As Matt Flynn's offense severely lacked punch
Carolina 24, Atlanta 9
Smith came back with a vengence this game
Delhomme to Muhammad set Atlanta aflame
Turner was stagnant on the ground
and Matt Ryan found
that college and the pros aren't the same
Jacksonville 30, Houston 27
A game winning field goal keeps the Texans losing
Scobee and Garrard keep Jacksonville cruising
Slaton impressed me once more
Walter found ways to score
In the end, the Texans couldn't handle the bruising.
San Diego 28, Oakland 18
The Oakland Circus found another way to crumble
Kiffin's head went rolling, Davis continued to grumble
Tomlinson torched the Raiders bad
making Davis quite mad
Leaving Lane the loser of their rumble
Buffalo 31, St. Louis 14
The Rams' young campaign is already in retreat
While Buffalo became the new word on the street
Jackson found ways to run
but Green couldn't get it done
and Linehan was sent packing after another defeat
Washington 26, Dallas 24
The game of the week went the way of the Skins
and rebounded from a Week 1 loss with three straight wins
TO couldn't hold back any more
and the world is in store
for more tantrums and bitter chagrins.
Chicago 24, Philadelphia 20
Chicago was renamed Upset City
An epic performance that was solid and gritty
with star back Westbrook out
The Eagles were left in doubt
and that display at the goal line was shitty.
Monday, September 29th, 2008
Pittsburgh 23, Baltimore 20
Pittsburgh squeaked out a close one late Monday Night
Flacco and Baltimore's O looked ready to take flight
With the North up for grabs
and the Ravens throwing jabs
a Reed uppercut ended the fight
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